Here are a few easy steps to understanding how to date me:
1. I refuse to show weakness. This includes, but is not limited to:
- Showing that I am hurt or asking to receive special treatment because I am in pain.
- Asking for help when I don’t know the answer to something or when I feel as though I cannot physically accomplish a task.
- Putting up with a toxic or destructive situation for far longer than necessary.
2. I love challenges, but refuse to admit when I’m defeated or need assistance. Challenges include, but are not limited to:
- Relationships, romantic or otherwise
- Any sort of competition where I can win
3. I hate same-siders.
- I don’t care if you’re Prince Harry or Harry Potter – you sit on your side of the table and I will sit on mine.
4. I cry. A lot. Tear production can be created by, but is not limited to, these situations:
- Anything to do with a puppy
- Watching BIG FISH, GLADIATOR, or MOULIN ROUGE
- Any of the Budweiser Clydesdale commercials
- Greeting cards or sentimental letters
- Her family
5. I will never let you see me cry.
6. I have no idea how to take a compliment, but that doesn’t mean you should stop trying. Compliments include, but are not limited to:
- Anything related to my body, face, or general appearance
- Anything related to my work performance
- Anything related to who I am as a person
- Anything related to my creative process or outcome
- Anything related to “sexiness” or “attractiveness”
7. The people in my life mean the world to me, but loyalty means more.
- This means that once you have entered my life, you are important to me
- Don’t fuck up
8. I am still learning. Lessons I am learning include, but are not limited to:
- Allowing a man to open the door for me
- Realizing I can’t do it all by myself
- How to make the perfect guacamole
- Asking for help
- Whether to listen to my head, my heart, or my gut
9. I believe that all people deserved to be loved.
- I still have to remind myself that I deserve it, too
10. Honesty, Communication, and Sweet Potato Fries
- These are the keys to my heart.
You up for the challenge?